Living from the Philippines to the United States

 “A GREAT WAY TO LEARN ABOUT YOUR COUNTRY IS TO LEAVE IT”.

                                                           –Henry Rollins

I totally agree with that.This isn’t my 1st time to be out of my country, i worked in Korea for a year, which I think was a lot easier to adjust to than I have now in the US.Thank goodness the technology has brought the world ways to communicate with your love ones,or else,  it would be a whole lot of emotional stress.I remember the strange feeling I had when I was about to leave my country for the 1st time,i was excited but at the same time I was sad and nervous.I had to leave to get a job and support my family;that has always been my promise to myself.Growing up with my 6 siblings, and my parents was one of the best things that I’ve ever experienced in my life, but,it was the most challenging and hardest part of our lives, it wasn’t easy, life was so hard on us.We  were happy but we barely had anything.Everything I’ve gone through taught me how to live.After working in Korea,i achieved some of my main goals.For more than 5 years, probably around 8 years, we didn’t have electricity.After Korea,everything has gotten better.We finally have electricity,we have a decent tv, fans,a good size fridge, and a better looking family house and less stress, aha!my parents doesn’t fight that much anymore, you know, financial situations sometimes leads to unnecessary arguments.

Living in the Philippines is cheap, it really is!and I learned about that when I moved here.The Philippines have a high rate on tourism, not just because it’s cheap but you will love the places!

Since the cost of living is cheap,salary is cheap too.You can make $6/day (min.wage) in the provinces, as I can remember, and like $10/day in the city.It depends on what kind of job you have, your educational attainment, sometimes what/which school you went to, and this is why parents would always tell us to study hard so we can get a better job in the future and unfortunately,there’s more high school graduates than college, and a lot of people didn’t even step in school or discontinued school because of financial problems, there’s not a lot of opportunities in the Philippines.Here comes the reason why a lot of Filipinos would go work overseas for years to support their family and for them to be able to send their kids to school especially college, and whenever they graduate, the 1st thing they have to do is to give back,i mean take care of their parents/families.This is what I love about us Filipinos,very family oriented.

I didn’t make it to college.I felt so disappointed  for awhile because I couldn’t do anything, we couldn’t afford it, and again,opportunities aren’t as big as it is in the US.We don’t have student loans.I’ve always worked right after I graduated high school and Im glad I did, because if I didn’t I wouldn’t be this strong and independent person that I am right now.If you were to leave me on an island or somewhere alone,i would know how to live.I know education is very important, it’s the only treasure no one can steal from you.Now, i just wanna be happy, as long as I’m kind to people,i’m good.Your educational attainment isn’t going to be a requirement in heaven, right? But of course I would still go to school if I’ll have the opportunity.This time, all my heart wants is to have my own family, a happy family.I haven’t work since I got here,but I had few hobbies I did just to have something to do like making bows and selling them on etsy,or sometimes on consignment events.

I was gonna start wedding film business, but I stopped buying gears because we found out I was pregnant.We know we have to be financially ready since we are having twins!yay!so blessed! Raising a child in the US is expensive compared to the Philippines.In here, everybody needs to have insurance, in the Philippines,hmmm I don’t even know someone that has one, but I know we have health card.Technology is way too advanced in the US tho.

“FOOD”

Everything is huge in the US! LOL  From vegetables, to fruits, to meals! I remember the 1st time we bought my husband a large drink from a drive thru in the Phils.He said “I thought you ordered a large drink?” Well,that’s our large here hahaha it was like a small drink from here.A meal here is enough to feed 2-3 people back home.Let’s talk about rice! You know the struggle is real! there are few restaurants around who serves Rice,and it’s frustrating! I lost so much weight my 1st few months here,i was so skinny by the time we got married, we had to get my wedding dress altered!Rice is life to us Filipinos! So glad I’m finally adjusted with food.

“PEOPLE”

*Just like wherever you go,there are good people, and the people you just “cannot” trust!I love socializing with people that has same interests as me.

*People here likes to be tan, they use a lot of tanning products like tanning beds, tanning lotions, creams,sprays or just stay under the sun for hours.We,Filipinos,likes to be lighter, and we use a lot of whitening products,and if you’d go to the Philippines,you see a lot of people that uses umbrellas to protect our skin from the sun.I wanted to use umbrella here before too, but I don’t want people to look at me weird LOL

“DAILY ROUTINE”

In the Philippines,usually,the wives has to stay home to take care of the house or kids while the husband works.In here, most people are always busy working.I see both sides advantages and disadvantages.

“WEATHER”

If you’re from Louisiana or have lived in Louisiana before, you know how it is lol Weather is so weird.You’ll be surprise.It would be cold in the morning, be really hot in the afternoon and it would rain at night.It gets cold in the winter,reaaaaly cold! you will never see me fashionable by this time of the year!jeans,boots,jackets,sweaters.It’s not very bad tho, i’m just so happy we have a heater!   I like spring time, where I can start gardening; i love flowers! I love the fall too, but not when the leaves fall off the trees!if you’re Filipino,you know what I’m talking about!We take care of them everyday in the Philippines,in here it’s bad.Well,who would go outside and rake and burn them when it’s cold anyway?and snakes are scary! they are my no.1 fear! If I’d step on one i would die from a heart attack and not from  a snake bite haha

“ADVENTURES”

 

MUDRIDING with my husband! I was scared, but I learned to love it!

 

“FISHING”

I remember I used to go fishing with my dad, but this time we use a boat!lol The only reason why I like to go fishing here is because there’s no live fish you can buy around.I like to cook fresh fresh!

“DEER HUNTING”

It’s really boring! but when I see a deer I get so excited! It makes me sad tho having to shoot the biggest one when its family is around.Am I weird? LOL I still like beef and pork better than deer meat. Hmmm im not a fan!We don’t have deers in the Philippines,only in the Zoos! I enjoy doing it tho with my husband,he lets me take a nap in the deer stand and he keeps it warm with a heater hahaha I love him so much!

I’m sure there’s a lot more differences I can share, but I will tell you again guys later on as I learn more.I’ll see you again on my next article! Thank you for taking time to read my 3rd blog.If you have questions and suggestions for my next blog, feel free to leave a comment.Please share my blog, sharing is caring! Have a wonderful day,God Bless you!

 

Being Pregnant -with TWINS!

                                             “ZAYN and ZANDER”

They said you are more likely to become pregnant with twins naturally when you are in your 30’s and 40’s.Well,i’m 23.I think mine is genetic tho, from my dad’s side.My aunt and Uncle are twins.My aunt had twins but unfortunately the other one didn’t make it.My cousin has twins too.But heck!I wasn’t expecting to have twins!

*   THE + SIGN x3!

I was always regular with my period.For some reason, that time I was not aware that I was already 5 days late.Three days before, this girl was busy gardening, mowing and transferring some dirt to the vegetable garden, doing heavy work in the middle of the heat.That night I had dark brown spotting, well for me that means 1st day of period has begun.The next day I went to Baton Rouge with my sis in law to visit her family.I knew something was wrong with me, I didn’t have energy, i thought I was getting sick! One afternoon after playing with the kids,i was kinda off, so I took a nap,i was feeling so tired.I woke up and realized I still wasn’t bleeding.The next day, it started again, but it stopped before we headed back home.So,as soon as I got home I bought a PT,and then i took a nap.

TADAAAAAAAAA!!! positive!

I was so happy but I wasn’t smiling! So shocked! I didn’t know what to do! My face didn’t even know what reaction it should  make!LOL – mixed emotions…I was messaging my husband that time, he called right away of course! (he was at work) Our prayer has been answered! I tried to calm myself down,i was sweating.I knew I still have 2 more pregnancy test to try, just to make sure, you know?We did not tell anyone yet but my sis in law,i had to send her pic and asked her if I was reading it right hahaha

2nd test,+!     3rd test,+!

 

So it’s confirmed! I’M PREGNANT!!! we told our parents the next day, they were all super excited!

  • First Dr. appointment

1st time parents to be, of course we were beyond excited to find out how the baby was doing.We were praying so hard to find a healthy baby heartbeat.

‘Well,yall’s babies are looking good and healthy” dr.said. In my mind i was like,”did she just said BABIES??? I looked at my husband.

“You’re having TWINS! ” dr.said.I looked at my husband again, and oooooh, his face was red with his mouth and eyes are wide open! Im sure I did the same thing.I started shaking so I had to scream…”OH MY GOD,TWINS??? ARE YOU SERIOUS??? (Josh had to tell me to calm down haha!) Well.i was so shocked! He was supposed to video the whole thing too but when he heard babies he forgot about the world for a minute. He was not talking the whole time he was driving home, it almost made me feel like he wasn’t happy.Of course he is! He is pumped but he’s in shock! It didn’t sink in  until after few weeks! We are for sure twice blessed!                  

We found out we were having twin boys at 15 weeks! Another shocking moment! We still can’t believe we are having twins…and twin boys, right now.But we are beyond excited! We cannot wait to meet them!

 

* CRAVINGS

Hungry all the time x2! Few weeks before we found out I was preggo,i ate a lot of crawfish like almost everyday.I would eat like 5-10 lbs.If we were to count how many crawfish I ate this year, it would be enough to fill a crawfish pond.Second thing I remember craving for was cucumber on a hot and spicy vinegar.I ate some strawberries and green grapes at night too.I went back to the Philippines for my birthday this year, but it really was to satisfy my cravings.Of course i ate my fave fruits,veggies,snacks,street food.I craved for green, really sour mangoes.I sure started showing after my vacation back home.The past few weeks i have been eating a lot of waffles, milk chocolates, hot chocolate drink, and beef tips where I go to “Granny’s Family Restaurant” for that, and because buffet is life! Most of all i love rice.The more rice, the better!

* SMELL SENSITIVITY

Not really concern about this one.The only thing that bothered me a lot was my dog! I hated her smell.I would give her a bath and I could still smell her like a rotten egg or something.I threw up a lot.I was so mean to her too,didn’t wanna see her,i didn’t wanna hear her, didn’t wanna be around her! Awe! Poor dog,i know right!That was my 2nd month of pregnancy I think.Everything else smells normal.

So far, right now, the babies are doing good.I had to get 2 steroid shots last week tho for them to stay in longer since I was already 1cm dilated.Im only 29 weeks right now and my belly looks like 35 to me.It has been a hard work trying to get outta bed and even just a little bit of walking takes my breath away.Im being put to bedrest, was told not to do dishes, no laundry, no cleaning, no lifting..oh,not fun at all…but anything for my boys!

*  THOUGHTS

I’m already in love with them.Feeling them move everyday makes me feel like I’m the most blessed mom to be in the world.Sometimes it really feels weird and funny when they both move at the same time.We are so ready to meet them.I remember those times when I used to watch twin videos online,i love watching #itsjudytime.

I always prayed for twins.I always wanted to have twin girls.But Im so blessed that God gave us twin boys.There’s lots of people that can’t have babies or lost babies, and we were given 2?We are forever grateful.I remember when a friend of mine posted something on Facebook about what their preacher told her.”YES,NO,or WAIT”.They have been trying for yeeeears…dr.told her they can’t have babies anymore but see, now she is pregnant.If you’re one of the women who’s been trying for awhile too, don’t lose hope.God knows what’s best for you.His plans will take you to your journey, and happiness will follow.

So,this is all for today, i have a lot of things I still want to share but I will write them again on my next blog.If you have questions, advice, please comment below.Please like and share this post too.I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it.Have a wonderful day and GOD BLESS!

What it’s like to be an ”OILFIELD WIFE”

 

                                                 WONDERFUL!

but not all glitters and rainbows.My husband works offshore, basically 6 months working and 6 months at home with his 28 days work and 28 days off schedule.We live in a small town in Louisiana called Monroe.We have a dog and living a simple life.We both like to travel to places and eat but unfortunately, we don’t get to do that often.This is the hardest part..missing holidays at home.We always have to either celebrate something when he is home or celebrate  it later when he comes back,sometimes we end up not celebrating at all because of the fact that we are always busy when he’s in.

Sometimes,i don’t understand how some wives complains about not getting a lot of “ME TIME” when their husband is mostly home.I sure don’t know what they go through,but it makes me really sad.I always wish my hubby is home with me.It is very hard to be so far away from him.

I moved to the  US Nov.2015.I didn’t know anyone except for those that I was already talking to in Facebook!(his friends and family).We planned our wedding few months before we started on my visa.Got married Jan.2016.We had a simple but elegant wedding.From the decorations, to everybody’s outfits, to his family and friends who came,I loved it!I was gonna sing him a song but when the music started, oh my goodness all I could think about was my family back home in the Philippines,im feeling sad and sorry that they don’t get to watch me walk down the aisle, glad my sister in law stopped the song!LOL! I couldn’t stop crying! But,it was the happiest day of our lives.I sing to him a lot when he’s home anyway, and trust me it bothers him sometimes.haha                    So,after a week, he left for work.

He left,I was home alone.I am sure I’m not the only oilfield wife who cries every time the husband leaves.I always try not to show him tears,i wait until he leaves the driveway.And then there I am,somewhere around the house sobbing, crying it out, because dang! It hurts to watch him leave knowing he will be gone for a month again.But,it is so much better than those times he had to leave the Philippine Airport!

Back then, staying at home felt like a punishment to me.I was an outgoing person before I came here,I do not like being at home all the time.I would always go somewhere meeting friends, clients,delivering orders,or eat.

My first few months here,I couldn’t drive yet, no friends and no dog,no people that walks around, people are always busy,so,just me and the crickets around I hear at night.I am so glad and truly blessed to have a very caring in laws.They are always there for me.They took me to places I needed to go, take me out for lunch and shop,i think it has helped me a lot. I remember that night when I first got here.Of course I was so happy to be finally with my sweet love! no more thousands of miles apart! The next day was “THANKSGIVING DAY”,oh, i was not prepared at all! We were both so jet lagged and exhausted from almost a 24 hr flight.I was so tired!I was embarrassed showing up wearing jeans, teeny shoes and a long sleeve shirt.They were all dressed up.Not just that, i was so scared to talk to them because…oh my goodness my English isn’t so good at all, and their slang just makes my nose bleed!thank goodness my Josh knew I needed him to say the words slowly!hah!every time! Second day I got to meet his dad’s side of the family.Can you imagine moving to the other side of the world not knowing anyone but your fiancee? at first I was scared, but after almost 2 years I can say I’m finally adjusted!From the food, to the people, to the language,to the culture,to the place.Now I have friends.I can drive whenever and wherever I want to.Met few Filipino friends too.

I am amazed how my husband handled our 1st few months together. It was not the same like it usually was because of course, we only had limited time together when he would go visit me in the Phils!But I am so proud of how much effort and sacrifices he made to get me here.You never really know what  true love can do huh? You never really know how dedicated an oilfield man is until you get to be his wife.Maybe not all of them but I’m so proud mine is! Passionate,humble,caring,understanding,loving,very good listener, funny,and God-fearing.Being an oilfield wife is one of the best role a woman can have in this world.It is a blessing.It is something that not a lot of people can take, and something that you would never imagine can change your life in so many ways.Only strong women can understand and handle.It’s not all about the money they make,it’s the home they build, the strong foundation of love they put on our homes.They long for our hugs too, kisses,kind words, they need our encouragement too just like how we feel when everything else in this world seems to crash on us.They’re always tired, sometimes really sleepless, they don’t get to choose what they wanna eat everyday, they don’t get to sleep on a king/queen size bed, and trust me internet is what makes it really sad and hard.You can’t talk to him when you want or need to.It’s tough.So I really salute all the oilfield wives especially those who have kids, and hats off for the oilfield men out there who takes care of their family.

My husband and I still have a long way to go,i believe.We’ve been married for only a year and half.And oh, kids? I’m 28 weeks pregnant…with TWIN BOYS!!! due on Nov.!   So if you have any advice you can give us, we would love to hear.English is not my 1st language,so excuse my grammar!LOL I’m trying! Thank you for taking time to read my very 1st blog.Have a good day! GOD BLESS!!      !

The Millennial Valentines

2E61070F-B00A-4CAC-828A-76CAAB0AEA78Posts of pictures all over social media.Beautiful flowers,chocolates,surprises and all.I could see happy girls here and there,and sad ones too.
As a young married woman,it breaks my heart seeing all these girls complaining why didn’t they get something for Valentines? Or,why does some single girls doesn’t celebrate Valentines? It is nice for your lover to give you something for hearts day,i mean,my husband got me chocolate covered strawberries and beautiful bouquet of tulips,he even got our 4 month old twin boys stuffed toys and had their names on it saying first Valentines.I thanked him for all the special things he gave us today,but those aren’t the things that made me happy,it’s his thoughtfulness.I was so busy all day trying to take care of whiny teething babies,I wasn’t expecting anything because he works his butt off to provide our needs and give us good life and that’s what Valentines means to me.
Love is not about what your significant other can give you,but what he does to keep you happy and safe.He will give you flowers because he wants to put a spark in your eyes when you smile.He wants to remind you,you are loved,and not because he thinks the flowers are beautiful.
You didn’t get flowers today? It’s okay.
Let me ask you this:
Did he tell you he loves you today?
How about yesterday?Does he show you he loves you? If your answers are no then you know why you didn’t get flowers,something is wrong.
Something is wrong if you are sad because you didn’t get anything today.I may not know his reasons,but,if you think he loves you then you shouldn’t worry about that.
Today,even if I didn’t get anything? I would still thank my man for being such a good and loving husband to me.I’d tell him how much I appreciate all his time and effort working away to provide our needs and for taking good care of us.Sometimes we have to think big by appreciating the small things they do for us.
For my single friends that was left heart-broken,it’s okay.Love is blind.You will never see it coming,because God is still working on this man He wants you to be with.For my friends who don’t get to spend Valentines with their spouse anymore,it’s okay,God thought your husband/wife is amazingly special that He took him/her to heaven.
For my single girl friends who have closed their hearts,open it up,men aren’t all the same.Take chances,make a change or make chances and take a change.
And always remember,Valentines aren’t only for lovers,but for all of our love ones too.Your family is your first love,never forget that.
My dear friends,let us be more appreciative of what our partners do for us than what they give us.Spread the love!

Feeling Ugly after Pregnancy

118C0C1C-6356-4309-B2C6-5747468B4CB7I’ve been feeling ugly lately.
Countless times staring at my post partum body in the mirror hoping that soon these horrible stretch marks would go away.I feel like im less than what im made of even tho i weigh more now lol.No time to take care of my nails,and i call them rustic vintage kind(i watch too much Fixer Upper).My hair’s got about 3 inch roots that needs some pampering.The forest-looking uneven eyebrows.My acne-prone skin that needs to get covered with make up everyday,because let’s face the reality,some people judge on how we look.My bigger thighs and a twin-pouch belly.This thicker hair after pregnancy that looks like every strand was shocked and burnt.It used to be silky straight,well taken care of,long hair.Momma bun has made it wavy and dry.Weaker knees and gets tired easily.I don’t remember when I started worrying how i look so much.Since when did I lose my self confidence?
This is what a usual post partum thoughts looks like.It has been 4 mos.since i had my twin boys.This is not depression,this is losing confidence.
But wait? You’re probably thinking…
she is so blessed to have two boys,why is she even saying all these stuff?
Of course i know i am! I am thankful for them every single day.I’m saying this because as a new TWIN mom,not getting enough rest means everything is stressful,little things that doesn’t even make sense bothers you and when you’re stressed,you lose your self esteem.
This is what i try to think about when im dealing with my other self.
My stretch marks are ugly,but i made TWO beautiful babies.My thicker hair was from all the prenatal vitamins i took eversince that pregnancy test popped up positive which made them healthy little boys.My bigger thighs is from all the weight i was carrying,meaning,they were growing on my belly healthily.My ugly fingernails were part of my hands that holds them,day and night.Pimples on my face that multiplied because I wasn’t eating very healthy,well,who’s got time to cook? But hey,it’s the face that my babies likes to see,that they want to see,the face that they smile to when they try to talk,the face that looks like them.This crazy,uneven eyebrows that makes funny faces funnier trying to talk to them.My twin pouch belly is not attractive,but it is my everyday reminder that not all women is blessed with one,there are so many girls out there that wishes they have one or they get to have one,i believed.I get so tired easily now,but i get my more energy as soon as my little bugs smiles! They sure keep me going everyday.I’m here thinking;is it the judgemental people? Or my negative thoughts thats making me lose my confidence? It is me who controls my feelings and what things i allow my brain to think about.I don’t look like how i want to be,but i am what and who i wanted to be—a happy wife,a happy mom,and God’s servant.Now,i am trying to be my old self,confident,and thankful,and that’s all that matters.

 

1st Three months with TWINS

 

 

It is just sinking in.We have twins!
I have always loved babies and im so happy to now have my own.Here’s my thoughts for the 1st 3 mos.
Cheers to making it for 3 mos!
I don’t remember how many times I’ve wished that someone can invent a shot or something equivalent to how much sleep our body needs because It feels like I haven’t slept for a year! IT WAS ROUGH,it still is.If you don’t have twins you will never understand how hard it is no matter how close your babies age gap is! I don’t know how my body is still functioning.
I tried to stay at home without help one night and it was the worst decision I’ve ever made,i cried while they were both crying.Staying at my mother in laws house is something that has helped me out a lot,and im so thankful about that.There were times that my in laws would spend the nights with us too to help me at night and that is so sweet because my family lives from the other side of the world.
The hardest part is that my husband works offshore,him being gone for 28 days makes it feel like forever.My friends told me to sprinkle ground rice cereal on their night night bottle and it has been amazing! They have been going to sleep between midnight to 2 am but they usually wake up from 9-10 am;a lot better than 3-4 hr of sleep for us! Their pediatrician told us to try at 4 mos but my friends mentioned that they tried it at 2 mos and helped em out a lot.They’re 3 and a half mos now so it’s close enough.Ask your baby’s pedia about rice cereal if you haven’t tried.
Now,they are growing fast,can hold their head on their own,they’re wiggle worms,eats 4-6 oz,likes to sleep on their belly,and tries to walk when they’re standing up,they smile a lot,and oh,they like to watch tv too! No matter how hard it is,we try to enjoy time with them while they’re little,they have grown a lot already.From Zayn being 5 lbs and Zander being 4 lbs at birth to stinking 13 and 12 lbs healthy babies.Thankfully they’ve been well even though millions of people in the US got the flu! We can’t do anything at home because all we do is take care of babies but if that means keeping them healthy and safe,we’ll never do the dishes! Haha “Twinmom life” i know! But did I mention my husband is amazing with helping me out with household chores? He does the dishes or laundry when im tired or busy,washes the bottles,organize some and watches the boys when im napping,i mean who does that? I am very blessed,right? My family is not perfect but they complete me.
I am one happy momma and wifey! Everything is finally getting a lot better and rest exists again!

Giving birth to my Twin Boys

 

I was uncomfortable that night before i started bleeding severely.I couldn’t find a good spot to sleep at so i tried sleeping in the couch.It worked.I woke up at 5am that morning having to go pee.After i wiped,i saw a little bit of blood on the tissue i used.I wiped again to check,more blood.I wiped again to make sure,more blood until it started dripping like crazy.The toilet bowl won’t even flush that time since i used like the whole roll of tissue.I was so nervous.Negative thoughts in my head started making me panic.Fortunately my husband was home.I told him we have got to go to the hospital.We rushed to the labor and delivery.Bam! I was 3cm dilated.The bleeding never stop and it gets worse when i would have to get up and use the restroom.I was admitted in the hospital for 4 days before i had my babies.Steroid shots,IV’s,Antibiotics,baby monitors with sticky gels on my belly,sleepless nights and stress are just few things i remember i hated.I was on magnesium drip for 2 days to help keep them in longer,and that drip made me feel like crap the whole time.As soon as they stopped it,i was finally sleeping good,little did i know i was having continuous contractions while i was asleep,my husband was watching the monitor.I woke up,nurse and doctor came and checked me,i was only 4cm dilated but right before they were going to leave my room,my water broke,emergency c section it is! It was unexplainable feeling knowing they were about to pop out! They just couldn’t wait any longer;they were so ready to be on mommy’s and daddy’s arms i guess haha Everything went so fast.Surgery was done quickly and i remember my boys both had different teams of nurses to take care of them.It was an amazing feeling when i heard them cry,I couldn’t help but cry too,for happiness.I was so happy,but i couldn’t hold them and didn’t have any skin to skin touch for a while,they showed me both of them for like 5 seconds each and they were sent to the NICU.My recovery was quick,i was walking by the hospital hallway the same day i had my surgery and spent few days in the hospital.Now,THIS IS THE HARDEST PART—
Going home without my babies.It was heartbreaking to leave the hospital without them.We visited them 3x a day to feed them and check on them,sometimes at night too! I cried every single time we drove home.Such a horrible feeling.They were 34 weekers premies,i call them my little fighters.Looking at all the tubes and cords and monitors in their bodies while we were there was so painful to me,and knowing they draw blood almost everyday felt like somebody was trying to tear my heart off in pieces.They were so tiny.Being a NICU parent was very challenging.
This is Zayn,5.1lbs.

This is Zander.He was 4.1lbs

I still cry whenever i see their pictures or videos when they all had those in their bodies.
They were breathing on their own when they came out,but the Dr.wanted to put them on oxygen for few days just to help them breathe.They were on feeding tubes for a week too,until they learned how to suck.I was breastfeeding them.One of the hardest part was pumping,for two! I was always exhausted.It was like never ending routine i had for a while and im glad i did! Because now,my breastmilk is slowing down and i wish i continued doing how i was doing.
12 days after,they finally came home.They were on 3 hr schedule of in between feedings,it was rough,very hard,but we did it.They are now almost 8 weeks,eating 4oz every 4-5 hrs.

It’s still hard but our bodies have gotten used to it.One smile and every tiredness of my body is gone! We got our hands full but oh my goodness I wouldn’t have them any other way! Two lovely boys entered our lives and our world is completely changed.I love them so much and if i have to do it all over again,i would.Twice the love,twice the fun.So if you are a parent of multiples too,i salute you.We are twice blessed.WE GOT THIS!